Preparing for school

Today we've started preparing for school.

The schoolbooks haven't arrived yet and one of the girls feels really bothered by that.
She likes to have a good look at them before schools start.
It's her way of dealing with her dyslexia: being ahead of things.

Like every year at this time the house is changing drastically.

Summerclothes are worn for about the last time, autumnclothes are not yet worn, but we're getting them from the attick and air them. Which is not possible at the moment as the weather is absolutely crap. So they're waiting to be aired.
Pencils are sharpened, things are moved around.

Today the drill was finally brought home by one of the boys, so we were able to hang the clock from one of my grandmothers at a different place.
I can't throw it away because I know with how much persistance she saved her money, cent by cent, to buy the clock.
It doesn't work anymore, and it's not very special, so now it hangs on a different wall, which gave me a rather large place on one of the walls to put my buddhistic things on.

Today I've painted it, as someone put his dirty hands on the wall while taking the clock away.
No, that wasn't me.

Tomorrow I'll hang there a very nice mandala, a lovely thangka (painting on fabric of the godess Tara) and a card of the Dalai Lama with a very wonderful text.

It's interesting that I never cared for hanging anything religious in our room, but now I like my corner with buddhistic symbols. In fact we all do.

It's strange it's september and the vacation is over.
In a way I didn't even have the time to really enjoy the summer this year.
Too much going on, and the weather of the past month has been absolutely terrible. It feels like we've never had so much rain in one month.

We need a few days of sun. The brambles are so sour... ugh!!

Taylor Swift

Have you heard from Wyomissing, Pennsylvania?
I would never ever have heard about that place if I hand't heard a wonderful song on the radio.
It was so beautifyl that I mailed the studio and I was told the song was by an american singer from Wyomissing, Pennsylvania, called Taylor Swift.
She grew up on a christmastree farm, hearing the lovely voice of her grandmom who was an opera singer.

Taylor herself started performing at the age of 10 at the local festivals and karaokecontests.
Already at the age of 12 she was able to play the guitar and write her own songs.
After moving to a village near Nashville her carreer got a boost. RCA offered her a recording contract, but she refused, because they wouldn't allow her to sing her own songs.
Scott Borchetta however succeeded to get her signature.

Her performances are very much appreciated and be careful not to use the link to Taylor Swift tickets because it gave me a warning with firefox, but I would recommend buying tickets for her shows because it's well worth going there.

In oktober, when I'm well informed by a friend who has a music shop, het new album Speak Now will be available. At the 25th to be precise.

I'll bet we'll hear a lot more about this wonderful and pretty singer.

Manic Monday #220

What are the values you cherish even though they may run counter to societal values?

Honesty, care and compassion, forgiveness.
And also developing your talents.

Mondays make me___________.

Look into my agenda so I won't forget appointments.

If you were to publish a book about yourself, what would you title it?

Just one of us.

But I first have to finish the book I'm writing now.

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The Continuing Story - Good news

Many many months ago we (familyphysician and I) started to make the first moves to transfer the 2 youngest boys from childpsychiatry to psychiatry for grown ups. Childpsychiatry is for kids and young people below 18 years of age.
The psychiatrist told us the oldest of the two could stay until the youngest would be of age.
So our stay had been long enough there.

The waitinglists, even for transfer, are so ridiculously long that the family phycisian didn't even remember writing the letters.

With Child Protection in sight we were a bit hesitant to transfer the boys.
They insisted I continued their care.
Ofcourse I told them that it was not my decision anymore when they're of age and intelligent enough to make decisions for themselves.
But they were so happy both boys were clients of this guy...

OK, he had a great smile, and I never left with ill feelings. But I wondered why such a kind man could reach such a level in his carreer by being so kind.
I'm not a fool in that area.

At the beginning of the ordeal with child protection he showede his true face.
I had a very unpleasant and from his profession very unethical confrontation, and he later stepped completely over the border by calling me and starting to throw his vision on me.
I'm still happy my phone gave up. I really was and I really am.

Reflecting on his activities for my boys wqas easy.
He'd done nothing else for my autistic son than prescribing meds and speaking a few words in 10 minute consultations. Oh, and smiling nicely. :)
He wrote one referral, which bounced. And didn't follow up on that.
He promissed a referral to someone who could deal with my sons eating disorder. After 5 times asking it still wasn't there. And he promissed to have talks with my son as therapy, to see if he could influence his thinking. I guess he thought that when I couldn't he couldn't, because he never started.

I was hesitant to change psychiatrists under the preying eyes of child protection, but fate stepped in our way and directed us straightaway to the new one.

THANK YOU!!

Last week the appointment of the oldest of the two came in.

And this weekend I exchanged mail with the new one who suggested another place to go to.
I gave him my arguments, like I did a year ago when he agreed to take both sons, and this morning he mailed me that he was OK to take them both, that his only thoughts for the other place was a case manager.... so I would have less work.

Oh, I could hug the guy, but it's a bit difficult through the cable internet connection. LOL!

So I'll get another pile of forms and questionnaires to fill in and we can go and say goodbye to the former psychiatrist.
I haven't decided yet how.
Maybe just give a bunch of helium balloons their freedom under his window with a bye bye card.

This really feels as good news.
A positive step for both boys.

I hope to have more good news later this week.

weather and steel drums

Many events all through the country are cancelled.
I've just had a look at the radar and within half an hour we'll be in the middle of something very nasty.

So when the phone rang I assumed it was my autistic son and his dad telling me they were almost home.

Instead it was a friend telling me to listen.
He yelled "Yes" so loud that I almost took my earplugs, which I use when bagpiping.
Good I didn't.

A steelband started to play and it sounded so intensely tropical and rhythmic that I sat swinging in my chair.
He made me listen to the whole number and I didn't mind. :)
What a great gesture to cheer me up like that!

In the past he worked at a factory ofstainless steel drums.
Not the musical instruments, but the ones that are used for storage of chemicals, for instance. Huge ones which can contain 30 and even 50 gallons of hazardous materials.

He explained to me the way they are made, but also the high safety requirements so nothing happens when chemicals are transported. They even apply seals to drums, so nothing can enter the drum when it's transported to the new owner for use.
He was the one who told me that many wines are stored in stainless steel barrels and not in old wooden ones, as tourists are shown.

I was very impressed by all he told mem because these barrels are used for food, chemicals and also nuclear waste.

He worked a few years at the company, until he discovered to make a steel bucket sound like a steeldrum.
Then he realised a dream and started to develop his real talent and now he's one of the famous steel drum manyfacturers.

Yes... those were his steel drums he made me listen to.

Boy, am I proud of him!!!

I should do nothing, but...

According to plan my autistic son went away with his father on a day trip.

I was surprised they even went, because my son often has "plans", but when the time arrives he's not feeling like going at all.

So we use incentives to make him go anyway, because otherwise he wouldn't go out at all.

The only thing he really likes it computering, and I said that we would spend as much money on him as on the others, so he was allowed to buy a 10 euro game online.
He found one and so he went with his father today.

Instead of leaning back I went upstairs to clean his room.

Many autistic people dislike others to touch their stuff and they also dislike others to clean their room.
But at the end of the vacation it's really necessary.

Last week the girls helped him dust his cat-collection and put them at another place.

Today I did a lot of other things, like cleaning in and under his bed, on and under his desk, the closet, etc etc.

He had been pulling so much in his closet that the shelves came out. Right on my foot. I can deal with that, but it wasn't a joy at all.
because he doesn't know his own strength he has had a too firm grip on the door, I guess, because it was hanging on just one hinge, and not all three.

So beside me I have screwdrivers (flat and cross) to get the door fixed.

After that I have to put the shelves back in and sort the clothes.
That means, I hope to have the time to sort them all out.

I expect them back within the hour.
He'll be OK with his game, but not with the fact that I'm still busy at his room and he has to wait a few minutes to put his stuff aside.

I wish we could make him go to a weekendhouse. Just once a month at least.
Going away on a trip like this is more than enough for him.
He'll need at least a week to losen himself from the experience.

I'm not looking forward with people interfering with family life, as we might hear this week will be the verdict.
The girls and I don't mind at all, and maybe we'll even get some good out of it. But it'll interfere completely with his life and we'll need even more energy to deal with it.

Wish people would understand we have a balance now in which everyone feels OK.

Those people know a bit of theory and think they know it all, and they even have the power to enforce things on us.
That is not good.
They have no legal command over him, or over me to change him, but by changing the ways of our family, they'll cause a lot of trouble.

I'm not looking forward to that.

Oops... am I complaining? Or just worrying ahead of time?
I'd better have a go at that closet and get it fixed.
Noop, no man around the house, just me.
But we moms can do almost everything, including fixing stubborn closets.

I'm talking ties here

"I'm talking ties here", my grandma used to say when a boy reached the age to use ties.

She took the chance to have a party as often she could and teaching a boy how to tie a tie she considered her job, not that of the parents.
She wasn't a real matriarch, she didn't want to plunge into every family event, but she sure wanted to have the tie knotted the way she wanted.

She could teach a young man everything about mens ties, including the most up to date fashion.

Ofcourse this rites of passage, first for her sons, later for her grandsons, were accompanied by a family gathering with applepie and coffee or tea and lemonade for the small ones. So we all could be witnesses.

Funny thing is that I learned to tie the ties too. Just by seeing it so often.
My best knot is a Prince Albert.
The long broad part of the tie is put twice around the small short part and then through the last loop.

Because my grandmom isn't alive anymore I've taken over this family tradition.
So I've taught my boys how to knot and what's in fashion. I also tried to teach them about colour choices, because often I see people wear ties that don't fit their outfit at all.

Like my gram I like solid colours best with a pattern which is woven into the fabric.

And you?

Message for our friends who plan to visit today

Hi!

I know some of our friends wanted to visit us today, because we wanted to go to the Medieval Parade in town this afternoon.

The parade is cancelled because of the weather expectations.

Most costumes are the result of hard labour and great creativity and investment, and they're so precious they shouldn't be exposed to heavy rains and winds.

For this afternoon weather warnings have been issued for the hole country.
In this area lots of rain is expected, with thunder and lightning and serious windgusts.

The parade is cancelled, but there are activities in town.

The most expensive clothes will be shown in the main church. So people can get their praise for a year of hard work and dedication.

When the weather allows figures with less expensive clothes will walk through town, but not in a parade.

The other re-enactment activities are not cancelled yet and probably won't.
But right at the moment I write this it gets pitchblack here and I hear thunder.
The temperature is dropping from 15,3 degrees celcius.

Because I've got a call from Leo to tell me they won't come because of the weather warning and the expected storm in their area later this day, I thought it wise to give a choice to you all and see if we'd skip the whole event and plan something else when the weather is far better, or we'll go with just a few people.
I for myself don't mind skipping the event, so don't feel hesitant when you want to stay at home.
There are plenty of new opportunities.

For instance the celtic event in Wijhe at september 4th.
I would love to go, but not by train, as it takes more than 2 hours for us to get there. (Hint hint!!!)

When the weather improves dramatically we can also consider a day at the beach.

Contact me or Adrian. Preferably the last. :)
When we get 5 cancellations we'll cancell today. If that's OK with you.

So let us know.

Thanks!!

He wants to limit his speed

Someone online told me he'd bought a radar detector to control his own speeding.

To me it seems that the regular speed signaling devices in cars are perfect for that, but he's not a very visual oriented guy.
I know. My memory stores images far better than sounds, but he always remembered exactly what was said and had problems remembering the texts of books. I've read some boring studybooks out loud for him and a blind student.

The detector gives a sound when it's in reach of a police speeding radar and when the car moves too fast.

Not everywhere radar detectors are allowed. When you go abroad always inform yourself well when you're using such device. In Greece the fine is as high as 2000 euro! In many countries you'll get a fee, see your detector confiscated, and you'll be faced with extra penalties like loss of license for a while.

The main reason is that it's thought that radar detector users work against the police by trying not to be caught for speeding, and that they speed when they're out of reach of the police radar.

In 2001 the results of the MORI study were publised and it turned out that detector users posed a lesser risk on the roads. They caused 28% less risk.

Isn't that interesting!

Our bicycles and small holes

Living with a large family in The Netherlands means we've got a nice collection of bicycles. One for every family member.

They're a cheap form of transport.
We don't have a car, so we're relying on those bicycles.

Flat tyres are a piece of cake to deal with, lights which won't work are no problem at all. We can deal with nearly every problem with ease.

But there are times....

One of the girls has experienced one of the most annoying bicycle problems: a tire that slowly loses air. It's bad enough to arrive on a nearly flat tire, and not bad enough to see it happening and to hear the soft hiss that accompanies little holes.

This morning her bicycle was the one to be repaired.

I've witnessed the problem, so I know it's not phantasy.

But after a lot of work the tire was put in a bowl with water and no hole could be found.

It happens now and then.
It means there's no hole at all, or the hole it too small to be found, even when the tyre is blown up almost too well and nearly explodes. The hole doesn't need only the stretch of the tyre, but also the increased inner pressure of someone sitting on the bicycle.

And today we're dealing with such a hole.
Such a tiny annoying little one that hides so well that it can't be found, but which causes problems enough.
It means I have to leave the house at the most inconvenient times, in the middle of cooking, for instance, to fetch the girls and walk home with them. Some of their friends alive outside the town so it means sometimes the loss of more than an hour.
But safety first!

Well, that tiny hole can't be found at all.
I have seen the tire causing problems after a while of bicycling.

So the problem is solved in a non-repairing way: she'll use, today, my bicycle.

As easy as that.

A new attempt to repair hers will be tomorrow.

The shopwiki experience for girls and their moms.

Yesterday, when we were talking about what we still need to buy before school starts, we suddenly realised that we forgot to shop for new clothes.

As the girls have lots of plans to stay over with friends and do other things their agegroup does at the end of the summervacation, we probably won't find time anymore for a day in the citycentre. It's not a real problem though.

Internet has brought us access to new outfits from the comfort of our home, and Shopwiki UK has given us the perfect system to find the lowest prizes and the best places to buy.
And shopping at Shopwiki UK is fun, I can tell you that! You should read the text at the link I just gave, it's plain humor.

Sopme people feel that the shopping system of Shopwike needs some explanation. I don't think so. It's easy, straightforward, and the pages offer a good overview, but I'll explain anyway.

Go with me to the page for Shopwiki's casual clothes for girls.
You'll see everything a girl needs, including accessories and outwear, but also links to related subjects inside and outside the site.
Or, when she needs...I mean wants.. to be more dressed up go to the site for Shipwiki's dress clothing for girls.

Just click a subject and you'll find why I love to use Shopwiki UK to shop.

Shopping at Shopwiki doesn't mean access to paid sites only. Instead of the 1,000 shops other sites refer to because they limit their links to paid ones, Shopwiki uses nonpaid links too, which means acess to more than 30,000 sites, including those online boutiques your girl just loves.

OK.
Decided what to shop for? Skirts perhaps?

At the right you'll find filters for prize range, colour, stores and brands. When you don't use them the whole collection available will be in front of you. Otherwise you'll hop to your special choice within a moment. The site is fastloading, which is great.

When you want to shop other subjects, just click a link under the filters, or one under the main part of the page. You'll find links to the buyers guides too, so you can inform yourself.

When you want to shop a special item, you'll see a picture, a description, the topstores and the prizes, the prize range and a button to click to all shops who have the item on offer.
Take the link to the jersey skirts for example.
You can sort them by price and popularity, make your choice and go to the store to buy the item.

As simple as that.

Ofcourse my girls love to shop special outfits, but you can shop at Shopwiki.co.uk for everything.
You can even suggest articles when you can't find something.

I love the fact that Shopwiki really provides access to the best prizes on internet, which saves a lot of money when your girls want new clothes.
My girls love it too, so the system is not only good for the wallet, it also offers what girls of today really want.

Giveaways for me?

I was asked why I don't enter giveaways anymore.

The asnwer is simple: because when I win I almost never get what I've won.

I'm still waiting for a DIY set, a book...eh,...three books, a pair of earplugs and a necklace.
I've won some other items too, but I simply forgot them, because i didn't want to get my hopes up anymore.

It feels sad, oh yes.
And I'm certainy not living in a forgotten country.

I know some people think that sending something to my country is far more difficult than sending USA only.

But my experience is that it's not difficult at all.

Well...I don't want to force people, but waiting for a package is fun, until the waiting changes in the feeling that again no one bothered to send me the prize.

Bah!

Have a golden retirement

The past time we've seen that a lot of people lost their investments in houses and other properties. Those who invested in precious metals however did rather well.

Gold has provided through the centuries not only a feeling of comfort and trust, because the possession of gold means security and a good return.

People have asked me if they can put gold in their individual retirement account.
Yes, you can, but government of the United States currently allows only Gold American Eagles and Gold proof American Eagles in your gold IRA. Proof gold has a limited supply and seems to be the best choice.
IRA gold will be subjected to taxes and maybe a penalty, unless you have the gold stored at a depository through certain gold IRA custodians.

The same goes for 401k gold, but it's far better to change your regular 401k plan, also called 401(k) plan, into a gold 401k.

Why?

Because stocks and other investments are like laundry on the line in a storm. Depending on all sorts of circumstances, like war, bank failures, high oil prices, weakening of the dollar against other currencies, your retirement savings will swing in value.

Gold is more stable. Maybe the value drops a bit for a while, but after some time the value will go up again. Gold is gold and will be gold.

gold IRA transfer won't take long. After filling in a form, which can be printed from internet and sending it by mail or fax to Aurum Advisors you'll be contacted so you know it's received and it will be processed. That takes about 5 to 21 days.

I know many people are hesitant to change the way they save for their retirement.
But consider the fact that when the golden standard was effective the dollar was quite stable.
Get yourself that stability.

Little Miss Can't Be Wrong

1. Who was the last person you dealt with that felt that they could never be wrong?

Someone from Child Protection Services.
Did you expect anything less after what we've been through last weeks?

2. Tell us about one person who is the most like you.

The most like me?
Oh, I've never thought that way.

The twins together are quite like me when I was young, but they're two people.

I don't know who's like me. I just don't know.

3. What is something you really want right now?

Vacation... a house at the beach for us with internetconnection to keep my autistic son happy will be OK. Just a couple of beds and a room for him to stay happy, as we don't think he'll enjoy the wind and the sound.

4. What are you doing this weekend?

The usual saturday things. Groceries, cleaning, laundry, making dinner for all of us, spending time together, watching TV.
On sunday there's a special event in town, but with this weather.... ugh. It's not very appealing to go then.
We've offered each child a daytrip of choice. Tomorrow our autistic son wants to go and get something he bought on internet (a game, what else) and maybe he wants to have fish and chips at the beach. I would love to go to the beach for a bit longer than yesterday.
Otherwise I'll do things that still have to be done, like making an extra seam in a curtain.

5. Are you in a good mood? If yes, Why?

Yep, I'm almost always in a good mood.
Because I try to live in the moment, I can feel OK when I don't have to cling on something.
Problems can be solved later, worries don't help, and the rest is in the past.

6. Do you have an ex that you are pretty sure thinks about you a lot?

No real ex's around.
My former boyfriends should call me if they still think about me, maybe we can work something out. LOL!
After so many years they'd probably have forgotten me completely. But...to be honest... some are still special in my mind. There are so many years in between that I probably won't even recognise them when they would pass me on the street.

7. What's one thing you wish you could do but can't?

So many things.
I would love to visit Nepal and Tibet.
I would love to study again, maybe become a doctor or lawyer. I've got the brains, maybe even the time, but not the money.

8. What's one trait you hate in a person?

Just one? Most of the time people don't show just one unwanted trait, but a set of.
Arrogance, knowing it better, enforcing a way of living on others, etc etc.

9. What's one thing you like to do alone?

Many things.
The most recent: walking along the beach.
It's nice to be with someone, but a proper conversation is most of the time impossible because of the wind.
And as I have always someone around, as there's always someone who needs attention or something that needs to be done, I like to walk alone in nature.

It enables me to get in balance in a short time.


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City of Diamonds

Visiting Amsterdam means being in one of the main places in the world where diamonds are transformed from stones to jewels.

Never buy just diamonds.
Buy certified diamonds so you know you've got the real things and won't be surprised when you want to sell your diamonds or upgrade them to one of higher value.

Always keep the diamond grading report and/or certificate at a safe place, and preferrably at a completely other place than where you keep the diamond it refers to.
Not only are they very important together to show the diamond is real. You also need the certificate for the insurance.

Many diamond sellers provide a special service for their customers. Brilliance Care, for instance, provides a free pronginspection and cleaning twice a year, which also includes polishing, rhodium plating (for white metals), and tightening of all prongs.
They value the diamond as much as you do.

In case you want to learn more about diamonds, visit the site of Brilliance Care.
I did, and I've learned a lot at the educational part of their site.
I didn't know so many shapes were possible, for instance.
And, I didn't know that diamonds can be bought at a price which is very reasonable for normal people too. Ofcourse I've heard about socalled growing diamonds, a system in which you can start with a small one and exchange it for a larger one later, but I never knew a diamond didn't cost as much as I thought.

Well, see for yourself!

Sea!!

Today a few of us went to Amsterdam.

We wanted to go to the tibetshop there, but when we entered the shop at the right openingstime we were told to leave as the shop wasn't open. No sign, nothing on internet, but the regular opening times.
What a disappointment.

Amsterdam isn't a town to be bored.
So we went elsewhere and enjoyed watching the wonderful characteristic houses, visited "our" buddhashop and went to one of the open air markets.

I used to dislike Amsterdam.
I didn't feel safe with all the pickpockets and other criminal minds.
But after visiting a friend a couple of times I feel OK there.

Maybe because I don't feel a tourist anymore, I don't know.
I like to go there without a bag or rugsack, maybe that's the difference.

Well, after the disappointment we just walked around. Did some windowshopping, bought a small present for all children, because none had a real vacation, and I had a long talk with an artist.

Our legs started to protest and we didn't want to spend a lot of money on a restaurant, so we slowly walked back to the trainstation.
Then we got the idea to go back to the trainstation and go to Zandvoort, to enjoy the sea and eat fish and chips.

As soon as we approached the sea the sun started to shine.

I can't tell you how happy we were to be at the beach.
The sounds of the sea... wow!
I gave my feet the best natural treatment in the world: walking through the sea.
Oh... that's so good!
The endless waves, the firm wind, seeing the horizon, being one with nature.

We even had a take-away dinner which was g-o-o-o-d!!!
The fish was baked ...perfect. Absolutely perfect. And the sauce was delicious.

The gulls were sitting near us waiting for food.
One was quite close and it was a pity I didn't bring my camera.
He or she was the perfect model.

Sorry for the birds, but we didn't throw anything away.
I roled the last bits of fish in foil and took it home.

Traveling back was a real ordeal:
Late train, a broken train, lost connection.
We were home almost two hours later that we could have been.

But we didn't care at all!!!

Re- enactment

It's the time of all sorts of re-enactment events.

This weekend our town will be transformed into a medieval place and lots of people will walk the streets in medieval costumes.
Some friends of me will act as musicians of that era. That means that they'll put their highland bagpipes away and use simple bagpipes and other instruments that were in use in those times.

Even though I would have had fun taking part too, this year I had no time to make costumes. Maybe next year.

I hope we'll be able to go to the parade.

A few of our friends will be at another event wearing pirate costumes. They'll reenact some seamans' stories during a story telling event.

They've practiced a lot and I'm sure they'll convince children and maybe a parent or two that they are genuine men of the sea.

We joked that their costumes can be used at halloween too.
I would appreciate to see something else this year, not the usual ghosts.

Plans?

Today we planned to take a day off and go to the beach or do something else vacation-like.

Instead we stayed at home.

Early in the morning I woke up because of a very bad lightning and thunderstorm.
The roling thunder came from everywhere and I even felt the bed shake.

Right when I slipped to the toilet, the girls and one of the boys were out of bed too.
It was like bombs fell on our house.

The rain came down in terrible amounts.

One way or another we went to bed again and fell asleep. We were so very tired.

At 11.30 we heard on the radio that already so much rain had fallen that it equalled the regular total amount of the month of august.

So we were OK that the trip has been called off.

Right now we're sure twice the amount of the month came down.
The garden is one terrible muddy mess and I'm sure we won't harvest carrots this year.

But that's only minor considering that all over the country houses are flooded, tunnels are waterways and even a dike broke.

It feels like we won't have vacation at all this year.
But we've had sensation.

Tonight more rain will fall and right now thunder and lightning are dominating the weather again.

A new job?

Working on realising the dream of moving means we have to find a job, one way or another, regardless if we'll move to another part of the country (far from the present work-location) or abroad.

I'm ready to take on one of my former jobs, which makes finding a job far more easy, but I'm also ready to change directions.
Working in the field of psychology means constant spending lots of time and money on additional courses. I think that staying up to date is a responsibility that comes with the profession. I can do that without spending thousands, I've done that.
With internet there's perfect access to all sorts of knowledge, and with the present level of post academic education, I think that knowledge is can be gained in more time-efficient ways.

In our search we've included management jobs.
After so many years experience my former study friends one by one accept a management job.
I'm not sure however if I would be happy in such a job.
I'd rather have complete independency and responsibility, instead of being part of a hierachy. I don't want to be in the middle.

On the other hand. After so many years managing my family and gaining experience on so many areas I would be able to deal with a management job perfectly well.

What do you think?

Air guitar

These past weeks we've been dealing with a lot of imaginary things and air constructions, but these can't comptete with the Air Guitar World Championships.
They're hosted this week in Finland. In Oulu to be precise. For the 15th time.

The purpose of the whole event is not to create a stronger longing for real guitars, bit to create world peace.
If everyone would play air guitar all bad things in the world would disappear, including pollution.

Well, at least we all, except for the air guitar player, would have a good laugh, because the way those people play mimicks the behaviour of the best guitar players on the world. You won't realise that with your eyes closed, but a little imagination and a good look might make you think of the grande old stars.

Not old is the instrument the winner takes home: a Flying Finn electric guitar.
That's a good incentive to practice all the year around to play...air.

The American, he called it.

A while ago I blogged about our sunday afternoons driving through the country with the posh car of our uncle.
Someone didn't read the whole post and assumed my uncle is still alive and he wanted contact because he was looking for Ferrari parts.
Interesting!

The posh car my uncle owned was not a Ferrari, Maserati or Lamborghini, but a large car of unknown origin with, what we used to call: wings.
It resembled a 1961 Chevrolet Impala SS, but the front was a bit smaller and the socalled wings at the back a little larger.

The car had a lot of space in the back and he used it to transport bicycles.
he could put a whole bicycle in a box in the back.
He owned a bicyle and motor shop and as an extra service he used to bring the bicycles to people in the area around town.

Sometimes we wondered if the extra service for his clients was more of benefit for him than for the clients. Often he was invited in for a cup of coffee and that was what he liked best: small talk and something to eat or drink.

None of us knew where he got his car from.
We're living near the German border and he often went on trips to buy some products and parts in Germany. So maybe he bought the car there.

"The American" the called the car and he treated it with utmost respect.
He hated it when children would touch his car, and one could see he always wanted to rub the surface clean after those tiny fingers touched it. Often he could withstand the urge until they were out of sight, but he wanted everything to shine, and shine more.

I wish he was still alive.
I'm sure he would have been able to find someone to supply the spare parts which are needed.

This part is over

Well, this part of the drama is over.

I'm so tired that I won't describe the details.

I feel this is completely in the hands of the judge.
We were manipulated and intimidated by child protection, again.
Right before and even during the session.

I'm quite fed up with what they do with people and I've already written down part of it for the book.

Three of my boys have experienced that their computers were hacked the past days.
It happened here too.
So I have to safeguard the concept of the book.

We'll get the decision of the judge in about a week. Which is a week sooner than expected.

I don't know it that's good or bad.

I try to trust in a good outcome, but right now I see myself confronted with two.. yep, two guardians, and I don't like them. Their eyes don't smile when they pull their smile-muscles.

I bet they won't smile either when they pull the strings of me, the marionette....

...

Disappointment in other people

Tomorrow we will stand in front of the blindfolded woman.

I expected the family physician to send us his impression of me and my daughter, to go against what Protection Services says about us.
I guess he forgot to inform us that we needed an independent doctor....
So we have nothing to speak for us.

Nothing at all.

I'm so deeply disappointed in how people have dealt with us, so very disappointed.
I have no words for it.

Only 2 (offline) people have used their intuition and stood beside us all the way.
It's our culture.
Care and compassion for others diappears so easily when something official should be done. People rather want to be in the grey area of the unseen.

I'm gratefull for my online friends who care far more and who supported us, even without ever having seen us.

Ofcourse some of them have experienced or know how much I have done the past years for others in my situation, but that makes it even harder to deal with the disappointment in the people around us.

before the summervacation I had a long talk with our family physician and he stated clearly that he didn't think my daughter was depressive or behind in development.
He also laughed about what Child Protection said about me: that I was burned out, had no time for the girls because of the autistic boys. He knows I have plenty of time for them.
I thought he forgot to write a statement, so I reminded him about it today.
Well, they don't do statements anymore, unless it's an independent physician. Well, why didn't he tell me that? Why?

We have nothing tomorrow to speak for us.
We're standing there empty handed against people who've created an image of us that is untrue.

Yes, I know I'm writing this twice.
Yes, I'm crying.

I'm afraid we'll become victims of a failing system, of the arrogance of people, of the lack of care of people, of ignorance and neglect.

Is this the world my children grow up in?
Are these the people who call themselves friends?


I think we're perfectly ready to leave here.
We don't have real ties here anymore.
That has become clear the past weeks.

I hope the judge will see what's the truth and we'll leave there tomorrow without anything Child Protection wants.
Otherwise we'll have to go through all sorts of therapies that have no use. It feels so ridiculous!
I don't really care for those therapies. Or for someone seeing how we are. Because we're a good family.
But I feel so very hurt that people have created an image that does no justice to how we are. Our good name has been pulled in the mud. And everything we said has been ignored.

That people were able to think dirt about us, that hurts.

So whatever happens, and no matter for how long we can't leave the country when justice fails, we'll start preparing the move we've wanted to make for a long time.

We're not limiting ourselves to Scotland anymore. But we want to be close to nature.
We don't have the money to buy a bussiness or something, but we're quite willing to work for elderly people who can keep their family bussiness that way.
So when you know something in the UK, please let us know.

Right now we plan to move as soon as possible after the final exams of the girls.
The plans they have for their future can be fulfilled in the UK too. And maybe even better than here, so it'll be a move for the better for all of us.

So whatever is decided tomorrow the future lies ahead of us, whether we need to climb stairs or can walk on bare feet through the grass.
And no matter what other people say: we're the very same people we always were. Good people. With care and compassion for others, who work hard for their family and future.
I'm a very good mom, and I know that.

But it would have been great to have a pile of letters of those who used me as a model, who often asked me for advice, who often thanked me for helping them out.
Letters from those who have seen me being a good mom to the girls and not only for the boys (as they ridiculously state), letters from those who know I'm a very stable mom, who knows the needs of children of every age, and who is almost always at home, because her children are more important than everything else.

My mistake is that I expected a pile of those letters,
and I have none.

So there'we'll be tomorrow:
empty handed in front of a blindfolded lady with a sword and balance.

storm

Today was a very strange dayn because inside the house it was very calm and quiet, and outside a storm was raging around the house.

The girls came home from sleeping over at a friend.
During a normal schoolweek it feels longer when they've been away, but now it felt like they came from upstairs and sleeping in.

The difference was a big bag they carried upstairs.

One of the boys came to cook.
He had invented a nice recipe and wanted us to try it out.

It was very nice. And we all enjoyed it.

As desert we had cinnamon ice. Yummy!!